TOPIC: Help required regarding pmp application

Hi,
I have written all the experience descriptions in my applications. I wont write all of them here as it becomes too lengthy. Can somebody guide me if I have written them correctly according to pmi guidelines or if I need to improve somethings. Thanks in advance for help.

I work as an electrical project engineer responsible for managing electrical installation, programming and commissioning teams.

Upgrade of medicine cartridge filling and closing machine
Upgrading human machine interface of cartridge filling machine to improve performance
Project Manager
IN–Developed project charter and finalized details of contract with sub-supplier.
PL–Defined roles & responsibilities, WBS, created cost & schedule management plans, conducted kick-off meeting with stakeholders.
EX–Executed tasks defined in project plan & conducted trainings.
MC–Conducted code reviews and performance tests.
CL–Recorded lessons learnt and transferred the final product.
Delivered machine with faster operation and enhanced data storage.
Initiation = 80 hours, Planning = 160 hours, Execution = 320 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 160 hours, Closing = 80 hours

Installation & commissioning of HMI for ampoules filling and closing machine
Programming & commissioning of human machine interface (HMI) for ampoules filling & closing machine
Project manager
EX–Managed resource allocation, executed tasks according to project plan and
implemented approved changes according to the Change Management Plan.
MC–Conducted quality control testing.Managed changes to the project scope
and schedule as defined in the change management plan.
CL–Handed over the final product and documents to the customer
Delivered HMI system for pharmaceutical machine with filling capacity of 5000 ampoules/min
Initiation = 0 hours, Planning = 0 hours, Execution = 320 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 160 hours, Closing = 160 hours


Thanks for reading my long query.

Thanks.

Best regards
Awais

Muhammad,

Please hold on before you submit your application. I read it over and found a few things that needs to be changed.

Overall, some tasks need to be changed to fit PMI terminologies better and some descriptions are too vague.

There's is a snow storm in my city right now, I promise I will give you a more detailed explanation when I get home.

Best,
Joe

Hi Joe,
Sorry to disturb you again. I am writing to remind you that I am waiting for kind response. If you have time kindly help me so that I can correct my application. Thanks alot for your help.
Best Regards
Muhammad Awais

Muhammed,

To elaborate my last post further:

Things you did great: Project descriptions are concise, they follow the correct format with the proper domains, objectives and results are clear.

Things you need to change/improve:
1) Use PMI terminology - what you wrote is fine but I think it will be better for the application reviewer to understand if you use more PMI lingos
Some examples:
-Use "developed RACI chart" instead of "define roles and responsibility"
-"Execute tasks defined" - is the role of the project team, a project manager directs and manages project work.
-"Conduct code reviews" - the reviewer may not understand that

2) Some descriptions are too vague and do not deliver any value in the descriptions
-"Transferred the final product" - To whom? The paying customer? Or the operations team?
-"Handed over the final product and documents to the customer" - Have you confirmed approval of the product from the customer? What comes with the handover process?

Happy to look over this with you again after you edit them.

Best,
Joe

Hi Joe,

thanks for you feedback and help.

I will edit them.

Should I post them in reply to this post ?

thanks for your valuable opinion.

best regards
Muhammad Awais

Hi Joe,

Now I have completed my experience descriptions of applications. It would be very helpful if you could give a feedback.
It would be very helpful. Thanks in advance.
Following is my experience:

Upgrade of medicine cartridge filling and closing machine
Initiation = 80 hours, Planning = 160 hours, Execution = 320 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 160 hours, Closing = 80 hours
Upgrading human machine interface of cartridge filling machine to improve performance
Project Manager

IN–Developed project charter and finalized details of contract with sub-supplier.
PL–Developed RACI chart, WBS, created cost & schedule management plans, conducted kick-off meeting with stakeholders.
EX–Led engineers through execution & QA. Implemented approved changes.
MC–Conducted quality control testing
CL–Obtained final acceptance for the project and documented lessons learned.

Delivered machine with faster operation and enhanced data storage.


Installation & commissioning of HMI for ampoules filling and closing machine
Initiation = 0 hours, Planning = 0 hours, Execution = 320 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 160 hours, Closing = 160 hours
Programming & commissioning of human machine interface (HMI) for ampoules filling & closing machine
Project manager

EX–Managed resource allocation, led engineers through execution and implemented approved changes
according to the Change Management Plan.
MC–Conducted quality control testing. Managed changes to the project scope and schedule as defined in the
change management plan.
CL–Obtained final acceptance for the project and documented lessons learned.

Delivered HMI system for pharmaceutical machine with filling capacity of 500 ampoules/min


Electrical installation & commissioning of roller coaster "Pegase"
Initiation = 160 hours, Planning = 160 hours, Execution = 320 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 240 hours, Closing = 80 hours
Develop & construct electrical system for global amusement park ride to increase ridership

Project Manager

PL–Defined detailed project requirements with the stakeholders, created WBS, developed schedule, created initial risk
& resource management plans.
EX–Directed cross-functional teams to execute tasks & implemented approved changes.
MC–Conducted quality control testing.
CL–Obtained final acceptance for the project, provided trainings to operator & maintenance teams.

Delivered electrical system installation & commissioning for roller coaster ride.


Electrical installation & commissioning of carousel "Monster"
Initiation = 160 hours, Planning = 160 hours, Execution = 320 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 80 hours, Closing = 80 hours
Develop & construct rotating ride for global amusement park to increase ridership
Project Manager

IN–Developed summary milestone schedule, project charter, identified risks.
PL–Created WBS, developed schedule, created initial risk & resource management plans.
EX–Directed cross-functional teams to execute tasks & implemented approved changes.
MC–Conducted quality control testing.
CL–Obtained final acceptance for the project, provided trainings to operator & maintenance teams.

Delivered electrical system installation & commissioning for carousel ride.



Installation of electrical safety system on amusement ride "SkyRoller"
Initiation = 0 hours, Planning = 0 hours, Execution = 320 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 80 hours, Closing = 80 hours
Development & Installation of safety system to improve passenger safety
Project Manager

EX–Directed the team during installation and programming of the safety equipment and
implemented the approved changes.
MC–Monitored the daily performance to ensure timely execution according to the schedule and created
change requests to fulfill customer demands.
CL–Obtained final acceptance for the project. Conducted trainings for operator & maintenance team.

Delivered a functional system which enabled a safer ride experience for passengers.



Safety system upgrade of the roller coaster ride "Junior coaster"
Initiation = 0 hours, Planning = 0 hours, Execution = 320 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 80 hours, Closing = 80 hours
Upgrade the safety system of the roller coaster to improve passenger safety
Project manager

EX– Led and directed cross-functional teams to execute tasks, implemented approved changes and managed
stake holder engagement.
MC–Monitored the daily performance to ensure timely execution according to the schedule and created
change requests to fulfill customer demands.
CL–Obtained final acceptance for the project. Conducted trainings for operator & maintenance teams.

Delivered functional safety system which enabled a safer ride experience for passengers.



Electrical installation & commissioning of rotating water slide "Slide Wheel"
Initiation = 240 hours, Planning = 320 hours, Execution = 640 hours, Monitoring and Controlling = 320 hours, Closing = 240 hours
Develop & construct electrical system for global amusement park ride to increase ridership
Project manager

IN–Developed summary milestone schedule, project charter, identified risks
PL–Created WBS, developed schedule, created initial risk & resource management plans
EX–Directed cross-functional teams, implemented approved changes
MC–Conducted quality control testing
CL–Obtained final acceptance for the project. Conducted trainings for operator & maintenance team.

Delivered electrical system installation and commissioning for Slide Wheel ride.

Thanks in advance for your valuable comments.

Best Regards
Muhammad Awais